THE LONGENING
by WeDrinkRitalin
Summary: THINGS HAPPEN AND THEN... MORE THINGS HAPPEN O.:
1. Chapter 1

ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A KARKAT AND THIS GIRL CAME UP TO HIM AND WAS LIKE "HI MY NAME IS FFFFFF" AND HE COULD TELL AS HE LOOKED AT HER THAT SHE WAS AN ASS AND PROBABLY IN THE MEXICAN MAFIA AND THEN SHE IS LIKE "I AM YOUR LOVER" AND HE WAS LIKE "WHEN THE FUCK WAS THAT ESTABLISHED" AND THEN SHE EXPLODED BECAUSE THAT NEVER WAS ESTABLISHED AND ALSO BECAUSE THE OTHER MEXICAN MAFIA HAD PLANTED LIVE EXPLOSIVES IN HER SOUP AN HOUR AGO.  
MEANWHILE THERE WAS A SOLLUX AND HE WAS CODING BULLSHIT BUT THEN HE HAD TO PISS SO HE WENT TO FIND THE PLACE WHERE YOU PISS BUT IN THE HALLWAY NEPETA AND ERIDAN WERE FUCKING SO HE DECIDED TO PISS ON THEM AND THIS MADE NEPETA CRY AND SO ERIDAN SHOT SOLLUX IN THE FACE AND SOLLUX DIED AND ERIDNA WAS GOING TO CONTINUE WITH NEPETA BUT SHE DIED FROM BEING PISSED ON. HE TREID TO COMMTI SUICIDE BY CUTTING HIS THROAT OPEN BUT HE SURVIVED BECAUSR. SUDDENLY HE GOT TELEPORTED INTO THE MIDDEL OF GTHE OCREAN OF ALCOHOL AND IT GOT INTO HIS GILLS AND THE PART OF HIS THROAT HE CUT OPEN AND HE STARTED SCREAMING EBGAUSE IT HURT LIKE FUCK BUT BEFORE HE COULD DIE FROM BREATHING A BUNCH OF ALCOHOL HE WAS RESCUED BY ALCOHOL PIRATES AND SINCE HE WAS NOW VERY DRUNK ABD THEY WERE VERY DRINK THEY PROCEEDED TO HAVE A VERY DRUNK CONVERSATION AND IT WENT SOMETHING LIKE THIS  
"ALKADSFLKNDGLNDGLKGNSDLKFN"  
"aklndskdsknwwleabsfdnsfklnww "  
"LKANFLKEFSLEAFAIRENLFKCXKXZL XLEEWLK"  
"lkgdnfosenrwwnfalsknflksdnvv nakldnfldnsofenrlewwel"  
AND AFTER A ROUSING GAME OF PUCNH EACHOTHR IN THE FACE HE WAS ALLOWNED TO STAY IN THIS SMALL ROOM IN THE SHIRP SOMEWEHREE. HE WENT TO SLEEP BECAUSRE HE WAS TIRED AND DRUNK.  
AFTER THE KARKAT RETUREND TO WHEREVRE HE FOUND OUT THAT SOLLUX WAS DEAD AND HE CRIED HALF HIS FACE OFF AND FREAKD OUT AOBUT IT (HE DIDN'T GIVE TWO DICK LAUNCHERS ABOUT NEPETA)AND GGAGMZEE TRIED TO HELP HIMS TOPFREAKING THE FUCK TOU AND KARKAT STOPPED FOR AWHILE BUT THEN TEREZI CAME IN AND TOLD HIM THEY WERE OUT OF JUICE AND HE CRIED THE OTHER HALF OF HIS FACE OFF OFF AND IT WAS NOW GAMZEE'S DUTY TO AVENGE THE SOLUX BEC AUSE KAKRAT COULD NOT BE EXPECTED TODO IT WHILE HE WSA LIKE THIS. SO EHE SET OFF ONTHE QUEST TO AVENTGE THE SOLLUX. BUT FIRST HE HAD TO FIND OUT HWO HAD KILLED THE OSLLUX, AND HE ALSO NEEDED TO DECAPITATE THE CORPSE OF THE SOLLUX BECAUSE HE WAS GAMZEE. SO HE DID THE SECOND THING AND THEN SET OFF TO DO THE FIRST THING.  
MEANWHILE ERIDAN WAS WATCHING TV BECAUSE THE SHIP GOT CABLE FOR SOME REASON AND HE SAW ON THE MAGI AL NEWS BROADCASET THAT FEFERI WAS DEAD BECAUSE SOMEBODY HAD EATEN HALF HER FACE AND SHE DIED FROM A FACE INFECTION FISE DAYS LATER. HE WAS UPSET BUT HE DID NOT CRTY AT ALL BECAUSES HE DEICIDED IT WAS FFOR THE EBEST, AND ALSO FUCK FEFERI ANYWAYS. BUT THEN HE NOTICED THAT THE TV WAS LEAKING AND FEFERI BLOOD FOT EVERYWHERE SO HE TOUCHED IT AND THEN TOUCHED HIS FACE. IT WAS THEN THAT HE NOTICED THE TENTACLE COMING UP FROM A SMALL HOLE IN HE BOAT. THIS WAS BECAUSE IT HAD GRABBED HIS FOOT AND WAS PULLING HIM CLOSER. HE KICKED AND SCREAMED AND THEN WHEN HE ESCAPED ITS GRIB HE TOOK A BOOK AND HE SMASHED IT UNTIL IT WENT AWAY AND THEN PUT THE BOOK ON THE HOLE SO IT COULDN'T POKE BACK IN.  
GAMZEE WAS ASKGING AROUDN TO SEE IF ANYONE KNEW WHO KILLED SOLLSUX. "uH, i'LL BET IT WAS, vRISKA," SAID TAVROS. EVERYBODY TOLD TAVROS TO FUCK OFF BECASUE NOBODY LIKES TAVROS. HE WENT AND CRIED AND TRIPPED ON HIS OWN STUPID ROBOT FOOT AND GOT STABBED IN THE THROAT BY A STAKE THAT WAS LYING AROUND AND HE DIED. NOBODY GAEV A SHIT, ESPECIALLY NOT GAMZEE. HOWEEVRE, GAMZEE DID TAKE THE HEAD FROM HIS CORSPE BECAUSE GAMZEE IS GAMZEE. EVERNTUALLTY GAMZEE SOMEHOW FIGURED OUT THAT IT WAS ERIDAN THAT KILELD THE SOLLUX. HE TRIEDSD TO FIND ERIDAN BUT HE COULD NTO AND HE WONDERED WHERE THE FUCK THAT GUY WAS. HE HAD NO WAY OF KNOWITTNG THATHE WAS ON AN ALCOHOL PIRATE SHIP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ALCOHOLS OCEAN, BUT SOMEHWOE HE WAS GOINGTO FINSD OUT. HE WENT OGUSIDE AND ADSDKED AROUND ADN SOMEHOW SOMEBODY KNWEW AND TOLD HIM. SO HE BEGERAN HIS TRIP TO THE OCRAEN OF ALCOOHL. HE HAAD NO IDEAD HOW TO GRTY THERE BUT IT COUDLNT'R POSSIBLY BE THAT FARAWAY, I EAMNSERIOUSLY.  
BUT IT WAS THAT FAR AWAY.


	2. Chapter 2

THEBN OUT OF FDUCKIN NOWHWERE THERE WAS THIS OTHER ALCOHOL PIRATE SHIP AND THE ALCOHOL PIRATES THAT HAD RESCUED ERIDAN DECIDED TO RAID THEM BECAUSE SFUCKING BUNNYFUCKMAN, AND ASHSHHHHHHHHHHHHHATLT The Fith. SO THEY HAD THIS EPIC PIRATE BATTLE AND IT WAS LIKE WHOA MAN  
ERIDAN WAS ASLEEP THE ENTIRE TIME AND DID NOT GET TO PARTICIPATE. HE DUD HAVE WET DREAMS THOUGH. WHEN HE WOKE UP HHE WAS SAD BECAUSE HE DID NOT GET TO DO PRIATE THINGS. LIKE RAPING ANY CAPTIVES THE OTHER SHIP HAD, OR ANYONE they TOOK CAPTIVE. ALSO, CAPRIATIONS S,AND MOTHERUFKKING JONESWILLIAEEN, AND THE OMEGAAPHALBETAGAMMA. YEaEEAHHHHYEAHHH-YEAHHHHH. SO HE CRIED FOR A LONG TIME BUT THEN THEY SHOVED ALCOHOL DOWN HIS THROAT UNTIL HE GOT SO DRUNK THAT HE JUST STARTED PUNCHING THE FLOOR. AND THEN THE FLOOR BROKE. THEN THE FLOOR GOT PISSED AND FCKED HIS SDHIT UP SO HARD THAT HE INFLITCTED A FUCKTONOF SHORROR UPON WRIGGELRS AND KILDACLAKCAKLSDJKASDJAKSD EVerywherE. THAT IS IF THEY COULD HAVE SEEN FLOOR ON THE SHIP BUT THEY COULDN'T BECAUSE THEY WERE NOT TEHRE. also beCause kajtheY WERE MONRESLS CHILD.  
ANYWAYS MEANWHILE THE GAMZEE HAD GONE TO THE PLACE OF THE PLACE, AND HE FOUND THIS GHOST MAN WHO KNEW WHERE THE ALCOHOL OCEAN WAS SO HE WAS LIKE "fuckman. WhAtSasdLKsGOIN OOONNNNNN, wohahhh shit motherfuckuing fuck fuckers i dont even motherfucking know whats happening to me." AND THEN HE GOT HIT BY A MOTHERFUCKING PLANE, WHICH EXPLODED. BUT HE MIRACULOUSLY SURVIVED AND THEN HE GOT TELEPORTED TO THE ALCOHOL OCEAN ON A MAGICAL FLOATING DICK. ANDREW HUSSIE AND CHICUK NAORIIS WERE THERE, ON A WHALE. TYRNING INTO NORSE ELVES. ANYWAYS THE GAMZEE WENT TO FIRND THE ERIDAN BUT HE HAD NO FUCKING IDEA WHERE THE ERIDAN WAS SO HE JUST KIND OF LOOKED EVERWHERES AND BUT HE STILL DO NOT FIND HIM.  
MEANWHILE THE ERIDAN WAS WATCHING TV AGAIN BECAUSE THERE WAS NOTHING ELSE TO FUCKING DO ON THE SHIP SINCE HE MISSED THE RAID EXCEPT GET REALLY DRUNK AND HE HAD ALREADY DONE THAT. AND IT ALWAYS FUCKIN ENDED IN FUCKIN WRIGGLERS FUCKIN THE MOTHERFURB. SO HE WATCHED TV AND THERE WAS NOTHING ON EXCEPT A CARTOON ABOUT KIDS WHO WATCH PORN ALL THE TIME. GOLD SKUWEBTK WATCHASDED AND MATSTURBAasTED IN THE CORNER. FOR 12 HOURS. AND THEN ERIDAN TURNED THE TV OFF AND SMACKED HIS FACE INTO THE WALL JUNTIL HE PASSED OUT. HOWEVER HE HAD WALLfCUK AND CHILD A HOUR LATER. THEY WERA ALL NOT HISAND IT WAS ACTUALLY ASDKDJASDKJADKASDJSKDJKASDS CHIDL. SO HE DIVORCED THE WALL AND TOLD IT IT WAS A WHORE. SILVER SFUSACKCKED and the aflooooooorrr asdwas fmad in 2012, cAausin mAotherfucking riots, and acutal morherfuckin. ANYWAYS SUDDENLY A WHILE AFTER THAT A GAMZEE ON A GIANT DICK SMASHED THROUGH THE WALL. THIS CAUSED ALCOHOL TO FLOOD INTO THE BOAT, AND WAS PROBABLY A PRETTY STUPID IDEA. ALSO MAKING THE WALL lOOSE ITS VIRGINATITY, AND CAS. THE ERIDAN HAD NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK THE GAMZEE WAS DOING HERE OR HOW HE HAD EVEN GOT HERE BECAUSE DF;J. AND FUCKIN WALLS MAN, HOW DO THEY FUCKING WORK. THE GAMZEE LEPT AT THE ERIDAN AND ATTACK HIM TO AVENGE THE SOLLUX BECAUSE THAT WAS HIS MISSION BUT HALFWAY THROUGH DOING THAT HE FORGOT WHAT HIS MISSION WAS AND ALSO HE WAS BLEEDING BECASE THE ERIdan had SHOT HIS ARM OFF. HE DID NTO LISTEN TO THE WARNING ABOTU NOT GOING TO VANS, ECVEN IF THEY SAID THEY HAD CADNY. HE LAREN THAT WAS A LIE. THE ERIDAN WAS CURRENTLY SHOTOING AT HIM BECAUSE HE HAD ATTACKED HIM AND NATURALLY HIS FIRST INSTINCT WAS TO FIGHT BACK BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT YOU DO WHEN SOMEONE ATTACKS YOU ALL OF A SUDDEN FOR SEEMINGLY NO REASON. BUT THEN THE BOAT CAVED IN AND THEY WERE SWEPT INTO THE ALCOhol AND BOTH THEIR WOUNDS STANG LIKE SOMEIFN MADE OF SALT WAS FUCK IN THE WWOUND AND FUUUUUCKKKKKKKKK. ALSO ERIDAN'S GILLS WERE BURNING AGAIN BECAUSE BREATHING IN ALCOHOL WAS NOT GOOD FOR THEM AND IT HURT A LOT BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO fucking DO THAT. ALSO BECAUSE HE HAD SOME ODD FORM OF FUCKING YEAST INFECTION THERE, AND AND ANDADNSAKDKASDJASKDJAKSJDASK DJ FUCKING WHALES, MAN. FUUUCKKKKKING BLUBBBERYWHALESFUCAT. IN HIS GILLS, ALSO SEAMON. I AM ON LIFW. anyways THEN THEY ALMOST DIED BUT THEY WERE RESCUED BY SPACE PIRATES WHO HAPPENED TO BE PASSING THROUGH. THOUGH THE DICK THAT CRASHED IN THE WALL HAD GOTYTEN LOST AND WHEN DOWN DEEP IN THE CAGINA ON T F THE ALCJOL SYK. WHERE EVERYWHERE AN ONE IS ERIDAN OR A UTRES OR ASLDALDKASLDKASLDKASLDAS DIAMAWHATHFIAMAISTPYING.  
THEY WERE PUT TO WORK AS SLAVES BY THE SPACE PIRATES AND GOT ALL THEIR WEAPONS TAKEN FROM THEM BECAUSE SLAVES AREN'T ALLOWED TO HAVE WEAPONS MAN THAT'S FUCKING STUPID YOU DON'Y LET YOUR FUCKING SLAVES HAVE WEAPONS WHAT ARE YOU RETARDED. I FMEAN FLIKE FUCKIN SERIAOUS. ALL THE GOOD THEY WILL OR CAN DO IG FUCK IT UP AND THEN FUCK MPREG AEVVEERRWAHHHEEREEEE. EVERYMENE. IS FUCKING AND SHFUCKT. ANYWAYS THEY WERE FORCED TO CLEAN ALL THE TOILETS, AND THERE WERE MANY TOILETS ON THE SHIP BECAUSE YOU GOTTA HAVE A LOT FO TOILETS IN SPACE FOR SOME REASON. THEY DId TnJot ENjoyW cSlEeAaMON EVERWYEHRe. CONTINUE. BUABFDSK.


	3. Chapter 3

SO WHILEDE EIRAND ND GAMZEE WERE CLENINAG ALL THE TOILETS GAMZE EHEAPPENED TO NOTICE THAT ERDIAN WAS NAKED EBCAUSE HE HAD BEEN NAKED THIS ENTIRE TIME BECAUSE HE HAD NEBEER BUT HIS CLOTHES BACK ON AFTER FUCKIGN ENEPETS ADND HE TOOK HIS MOP AND JUST SHOVED IT IN ERIDAN'S ASS AND GOT UP IN THERE. ERIDAN PANICKLED BUT HE DID NOT HAVE ANY WEAPONS BEXAUSE THE CAPTAINS OF THE SOASPEACE PIRATE SHIP TOOK THEM FROM HIM SO ALL HE COULD DO IS GO "no gam no wwhy wwould you do this gam stop" WHILE GAMZEE HONKED WHILE SHOVING THE MOP IN AND OUT OF HIS ASS OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OAVER. ERIDAN WAS EXTREMELY TRAUMATIXZED BUT HE BLOCKED THE MEMORY OUT OF HIS MIND. EVNETUALLY THE TWO ESCAPED BECAUSE THE SPACE PIRATES DECIDED TO BE MRRORONS AND LEAV EHTE DOOR OPEN ONE DAY, BUT ERIDAN DID NOT GET AHAB'S CROSSHAIRS BACK AND HE WOULD NEVER SEE AHAB'S CROSSHAIRS AGAIN. ERIDAN GOT HIS ASS OUT OF THERE SO THAT IT DID NOT GET RAPED WITH A MOP AGAIN AND GAMZEE FORGOT WHAT HE WAS DOING AND HAD TO WALK ALL THE WAY BACK TO WHERE KAKRAT WAS BECAUSE HE FORGOT HIS HUSKTOP LIKE A STUSPDI. EIRDAN WENT INTO THE CITY AND HE GOT ARRESETED FOR BEIGN NAKED. HE WAS THROWN INTO NAKED PRISON WHERE EVERYONE WAS NAKED IN THE PRIOSON ALL THE TIME. ERIDAN GAINED MORE MEMORIES THAT HE WOULD HAVE TO BLOCK OUT BECAUSE THERE WERE SO MANY WRINKLY COCKS HANIGNG OUT EVERYWHRERE. EVENTUALLY ERIADN WAS RELEASED FROM NAKED PRISON AND HE FINALLY GOT SOME DAMN CLOFTHES. HE WAS TEHN PROMPTYL ABDUCTED BY THE ROAST CHICKEN ARMY, WHO DECLARED HIM THEIR KING AND SOMEHOW GAVE HIM AHAB'S CROSSHAIRS BACK I LIED WHEN I SAID HE'D NEVER SEE IT AGAIN I WAS DELIBERATELY WITHHOLDING INFORMATION. THEY TOOK OVER A SMALL COUNTRY WHICH ERIAN RENAMED ORPHANERLAND. IN ORPHNAERLAND NOBODY WAS ALLOWED TO HAVE ALIVE PARENTS,A ND THUSLY THE POPULATION DECREASED VERY SWIFTYLY BECAUSE EVERYONE WHO HAD CHILDREN WAS KILLED. THE ROAST CHICKEN ARMY AND THE CITIZENS EVENTUALLY GOT TIRED OF THIS, OVERTHREW THE GREAT EMPEROR AMPORA, ADN TURNED CONTROL OF THE COUNTRY BAKC OVER TO THE MEXICAN MAFIA, WHO CHANGED THE NAME OF THE COUNTRY BACK TO MEXICLAND. ERIDAN LEFT BUT HE GOT TO KEEP AHAB'S CROSSHAIRS AND HIS CLOTHES. HE TRIPPED AND HE GOT HIS HEAD STUCK IN A BOX AND WHEN HE GOT HIS HEAD UNSTUCK FROM THE BOX THERE WAS THIS WEIRD GUY STANDING IN FRONT OF HIM SO NATURALLY ERIDAN'S LIKE "wwho the fuck are you"  
AND THE WEIRD GUY IS JUST LIKE "dad i'm your son from the future" AND ERIDAN IS LIKE "bullshit trolls cant have sons" AND SHOOTS HIM THROUGH THE CHEST UNTIL HE DIES. HE THEN FOUND ANOTHER CITY AND GOT A BEAUTIFUL HOTEL ROOM. MEANWHILE GAMZEE MADE IT BACK TO WHERE KAKRATE WAS AND KARKATK DESPITE STILL NOT HAVING A FACE TOLD GAMZEE WHAT HE NEEDED TO DO AGAIN. GAMZEE, AFTER ASSAULTING ANOTHER DUDE WITH THE MOP THAT HE STILL HAD, SET OFF TO FIND ERIDAN ONCE MORE EXCEPT THIS TIME HE DECIDED NOT TO BE A DUMBAND HE BROUGHT HIS HUSTKSTOP WITH HIM. ERIDAN MET THIS GIRL AND HER NAME WAS FUCKFERI. SHE LOOKED LIKE A TOTAL BITCH AND SO EIRDN DISREFARDED HER AND PROCEEDED TO OBTAIN MONEY. AS HE WAS ALREADY RICH AS FUCK AND HAD A LOT OF MONEY HE DECIDED TO USE THE MONEY HE HAD OBTAINED TO START A BONFIRE. IT WAS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BONFIRE IN THE ENITRE UNIVERSE AND PEOPLE CAME FROM MILES AROUND TO ATTEMPT TO DANCE AROUND IT BUT ERIDAN WOULDN'T AHEV NONE OF THAT SHIT AND HE SHOT THE ONES THAT TRIED TO DANCE AROUND IT. HE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO WOULD BE DANCING AROUND THIS BONFIRE, BECAUSE HTIS WAS HIS BEAUTIFUL BONFIRE. HE BEGAN TO DANCE AROUND HTE BONFIRE, AND IT WAS THE MOST BEAUTIUFL DANCE ANYONE HAD EVER SEEN INT HEIR ENTIRE LIVES, SO MUCH THAT, I SHIT YOU NOT, EVREYONE WHO LOOKED HAD THE ENTIRE FRONT HALF OF THEIR BODY MELTED OFF EBCAUSE IT WAS JUST SO BEAUTIFUL THAT THEY COULDN'T HANDLE IT. THE ONLY PERSON WHO SURVIVED HAVING THE WHOLE FRONT OF THEIR BODY MELTED OFF WAS GAMZEE, AND HE HAD TO RUN BACK TO WHERE KARKAET WAS TO BE FIXED UP. WHEN ERIDAN WAS FINISHED WITH HIS BEAUTIFUL DANCE, HE WENT BACK TO HIS HOTEL ROOM LAYED ON THE BED IN HIS HOTEL ROOM BECAUSE IT WAS NOT A TROLL HOTEL ROM AND THERE WAS NOT A RECUPERACOON INTHERE THERE WAS A BED AND HE DRIFTED OFF INTO A PEACEFUL SLEEP WITH A SMILE ON HIS FACE BECAUSE HE HAD CAUSED THE DEATHS OF SO MANY LANDDWELLERS THAT DAY.

TO BE CONTINUED


	4. Chapter 4

SO ERIDANS WOKE UP AND GAMMEMZMEEE WAS STANDING ABOUVE HIM AND GMAMZEE GRABBED HIM BY HIS FACE AND CARRY HIM OYTSDIED SCREAMGING AND PROTESTINGG. NAND THEN HE ATTEMPTED TO KILL ERIDAN TO AVENGE THE SOLLUX WHO HE HAD BEEN SUPPOSED TO AVENGE THIS WHOLE TIME TO NO AVAIL AND SO ERIDAN SHOT HIM THROUGH THE TORSO AND ALSO IN HIS HEAD SEVERAL TIMES WITH AHAB'S CROSSHAIRS AND HE DROPPED TO THE GROUND AND NOT-DIED BECAUSE HE IS INCAPABLE OF DIE OR SOMETHING STUPID AND AWFUL LIKE THAT THAT MAKES LITERALLY EBERYBODY UPSET EXCEPT FOR THE GAMZEE FANGIRLS WHO PROCEED TO SHIT THEMSELVES IN THEIR PUTRID GLEE. AND SO THEN THE ERIDRAN RAN TO THE NEX TOWN, WHICH WAS CALLED NEXT TOWN: THE TOWN OF NEXT AND NEXT AND NEXTS, AND BEAUTIFUL PEOEPLE WHO WEARE WINGE GLASSE ON THEIF BEAUTTIFUFL GORGEOSUS FACES. AND IT WAS POPULATED BY PEOPLE WHO WORE WINE GLASSES ON THEIR BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL GORGEOUS SEXYFIED FACES OF GORGEOUS AND SEX. IN AN TERRIBLY UNWARRANTED EFFORT TO FIT IN OR SOMETIHNG, ERIDAN STOLE ONE OF THE WINE GLASSES FROM A MAN WITH A LESS BEAITUFL FACE THAN EVERYMBODY ELSE IN THE WHOLE WOTWN AND AND PLACED IT ON HIS MUCH MORE BEAUTLFILCF FACE. THIS MADE IT IMPOSIBLE TO SEE, BUT AL DID HE LOOK AMAZING WITH THAT WINE GLASS ON HIS FACE LIKE THEAT. UNFOFRITUNATELY HE SMASHED HIS GOREFESOUS FACE AND THE GLASS INTO THE WALL, AND HE WAS BLINDED BY GLASS, NOT FROM THE GLASS BUT FROM HIS GLASSES WHICH HAD BEEN SHATERED. THSI AALLOWED HIM TO BE STOLEN BY A MAENFLICIOSUE ROVING SIREN. THE ROVING SIREN TOOK HIM TO EHER ROVING SIREN CASTLE AND PLACED HIM TNENTASTIOUSLY ON THE FLOOR. "MY NAME IS SAHARA MCEMILY" SAID THE ROVING SIREN, "IT IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL NAME THAT HAS EVER BEEN UTTERED BY MORTALS." "wwhat the fuck is this" SAID ERIDANS. "STFU YOU ARE GOING TO BE MY BORYFRAINED FOREVERS" SAID THE ROVING SIREN. "no im not you are fuckin insane" SAID ERIDAN. "NO ERIDAN. YOU ARE THE INSANE." AND THEN ERIDAN WAS INSANE. THERE WAS SIMPLY NO STPOOING IT FROM HAPPEN.  
MENAENEDWHILE GMAMEZEE WAS STARTINGGN TO GET UP AND HE VOMITED ALL OVER THE TOWNSPEOPLE. THIS CAUSED THEM TO FORCE HIM ITNO VOMIT PRISON. VOMIT PRISON IS VERY UNPLAESENENT BTECAUSE PEOPLE VOMIT ON YOU ALL THE TIME. ALSO HE WAS ANALLY OR SOME SHIT. "n9 n9 n9" SAID KANKRI, FURIOUSLY "y9u have t9 tag y9ur triggers n9w, and als9 it is extremely s9cially inappr9priate t9 make a rap j9ke." KANKRI WAS SENT TO SOCIAL JUSTICE PRISON, WHERE HRE WAS ALSO RAPPED WITH, IN THE MSOST SOCVIALLY INAPPROPRIATE WAY POSSBIBLE. HE WAS THEN USEXD IN A NOIN-HUMAN SWACRIFFICE TO SUMMON SUPERSATAN. SUPERSATAN CAUSED THE DEATHS OF MILLIONS BEFORE GOING ON HIS MERRY WAY TO ELSEWHERES IN THE UNIFERSE. NOBODY GAVE TWO FUCKS, NOT EVEN KAKNRKI BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.  
ERIDAN HAD SOMEHOW ESCAPED FROM THE ROVING SIREN AND ALSO HE HAD MADE AN ALLY IN THE FORM OF A HEADLESS CHICKEN WITH A STRAW FOR A HEAD. THAT IS NOT AN OXYMORON, SHUT YOUR DUMB ASS FACE. HE WAS ALSO GIVEN A QUEST TO FIND SOME CHILD'S HAT, WHICH HE QUICKLY DISREGARDED AFTER HE HAD SHOT THE CHILD AND LIOOTED ITS CORPSE FOR MONEY. THE HEADLESS CHICKEN SUCKED OUT THE DEAD CHILD CORPSES'S ORGANES WITH ITS BEAUTIFUFL HEAD. THEY THEN PROCEDED TO PILLAGE THE NEXTOT TOWN, WHICH WAS C ALLED POF. POF WAS A TERRIBLE PLACE FULLED WITH TERRIBLE PEOPLE ANYWAYS, SO NOTHING OF IMPROTEANECE WAS LOST. ERIDAN SET THE ENTIRE PLACE ON FIRE AND WATCHED IT BURN FOR SEVERAL MINTUES BEFORE THE SMOKE GETTING IN HIS EYES CAUSED HIM PAINS NA DHE MOEVED ON. CHICKEN MAN HEADLESS WAS UNFORTUANETLEY LOSRT DURING THE PULLAGING BECAUASE HE DIED HORRIBLY WITHOUT BEING MISSED. SUDDENLY ERIDAN HEARD A VOICE FO SOMEOBODY BEHINDES HIM AND HE TURNED AROUND ONLY TO BE PUNCHED IN THE FACEC. ERIDAN GASPED. "its you"  
IT WAS THE GHOST OF SOLLUXESESX!  
TO BE CONTNUESD


End file.
